Closed Room ー 閉ざされた部屋 ー

The man prayed to the stars.

“I don’t want to talk to anyone anymore.”

“I want to spend my whole life alone.”

“I don’t even want to feel

the presence of others.”

The only place he can relax is in his tiny room

in his old apartment.

The sound of water dripping from

the faucet is also soothing.

He put a crumb of leftover bread in his mouth,

but it was tasteless and odorless.

He felt his existence was slowly fading away

and was frightened.

He closed his eyes and reflected

on his life so far.

He regretted the life he had lived,

thinking only of himself.

As he looked around the tiny familiar room,

he noticed something.

There’s no door, no door to get out.

There was a window, but it was like fake

and could’t be opened.

It’s truly his own space.

He ended up confining himself to the space of

his own choosing.

“Huh, did my wish come true?”

Then, one morning, as the days went by without

any meaning,

something appeared from under the floorboard.

It was a filthy looking sewer rat.

Looking more closely, it was holding

something shiny and golden in its mouth.

It was the “KEY” that would open the door

to his closed heart.

男は星に願った。

「もう誰とも話したくない。」

「一生一人で居させて欲しい。」

「他人の気配を感じることさえ嫌だ。」と

安いぼろアパートの小さな部屋が　唯一落ち着ける場所。

蛇口から漏れる一滴一滴の水の音が心地よく感じる

食べ残しのパンのかけらを口に入れたが、何の味もしなかった

今、外に出出てしまうと、

自分の存在が徐々に消えていく様に感じて怖かった。

男は目を閉じ、自分の人生を振り返る。

自分さえ良ければと、生きて来たその人生を悔やんだ。

ふと見慣れたその狭い部屋を見回すと、あることに気づく。

ドアがない、外へ出るためのドアが

窓はあるがどれだけ開こうとしてもただの飾りの様に固く、

動こうとはしなかった。

まさに彼だけの空間、

彼が望んだ世界に閉じこもることになってしまった。

ふっ、願いが叶ったのか‥。

そう思って虚ろな日々を過ごした何日めかの朝、

床下から何かがが顔を出した。

毛は汚れ、見るからに不潔なドブネズミだ。

よく見ると金色に光る何かを咥えている。

それは彼の閉ざされた心の扉を開ける「鍵」だった。

＜250mm×290mm／Acrylic gouache on plywood panel, ベニヤパネルにアクリルグァッシュ＞